Reunited: Real World Vegas: To Gleak or Not to Gleak
By Kara Rozansky
In several hours I will be boarding a plane for my first trip to Las Vegas. Not only that, but I will be staying at Palms Casino and Resort -- yes, the very same hotel where Real World put up seven strangers five years ago and brought them back together for three weeks this past April to film Reunited: Real World Vegas. With no idea what to expect of my trip, I eagerly watched this week's episode hoping to pick up some helpful tips. This is what I learned:
1. Ordering up some strippers to your suite is a good idea for a party. However, once the ratio of strippers to party guests surpasses the 1:1 mark and your strippers are making friends with each other because there are so many of them, it's time to send them packing.
2. If after the strippers leave you still want to watch someone dance in their underwear, make sure you have invited one person to the party who has spent time practicing on a dance pole. Plan ahead to ensure you in fact have a stripper pole behind a glass wall in your suite to fully enhance your experience.
3. If you end up needing to do some pole dancing yourself, keep those toes pointed! It's all about the toes apparently (thanks for the tip, Trishelle!)
4. Follow Frank's guide to drinking yourself silly: Consume as much alcohol as possible until you are falling down drunk and mauling equally intoxicated women with your mouth. Then, when you think you are close to puking but you don't want to put the alcohol away, just start pouring it out all over the floor around you. Break some bottles for good measure while you're at it. You are a party machine and everyone needs to know it!
5. Gleaking on someone is not the same as spitting on them. Gleaking involves taking a sip of clean, refreshing water and sprinkling it down with the grace of the garden fountains of Versailles on a friend. It is not the same as hocking a loogie. Phlegm is for peasants. Gleaking is a fine art.
Now, if you have never heard the term "gleaking", welcome to the club. I never knew about it either until Frank made sure to say it after every other word while explaining how Irulan overreacted when he spit/spouted water at her (depending on how you look at it) during the second bachelor and bachelorette parties the Real World kids threw for Brynn and her husband Austin. I missed the initial explanation as to exactly why two married people were being treated to parties meant to celebrate the end of their single days but, well, it's Vegas, do you really need an excuse to party?
Back to Frank and Irulan. Although I think Frank was too drunk for everyone's good, I am inclined to agree with him. Irulan chased him all over the suite until she rammed into a table and fell. She made a big ordeal of showing Frank her HUGE injury (she had a small mark on her leg, there wasn't even any blood) while screaming "I hope it was worth it!" Then, when Alton tried to comfort her she got into a huge argument with him that somehow ended with her yelling at him too about how he's the big star and she's nothing. WHAT? Alton might be a dirty bird but I never got the impression that he was patronizing her. He seemed sincere, especially because he wasn't looking to get back into her pants.
I almost want to write Irulan off as crazy for her behavior but surprisingly enough, Trishelle provided some good insight into the situation. Gleak or not, the situation brought Irulan and Alton together. They may have broken up over two years ago but they still have some unresolved issues as most couples do. Living with an ex could drive anyone insane. In that light, although I think she needs to not run away from everything the way she threatened to at the end of the episode, I can understand why she would lash out. It's less about the gleak and more about the three weeks in an unnatural situation.
Irulan wasn't the only one who wanted out at the end of the night because of Frank. After Frank decided to redecorate the suite by dousing it in beer and covering it in broken glass, Arissa came home and flipped out. I still hold that something is a little off about Arissa but I can't fault her for this one. I wouldn't want to come home to that kind of mess either, especially since its highly unlikely Frank will clean it up. However, is it worth leaving the show over? Not really. She took off as well to the comfort of a slot machine. I haven't quite figured out where she and Irulan planned on sleeping so I can only add this last bit of wisdom from the Vegas crew to my list:
6. When in doubt, hit the casino.
I'll be sure to have a drink or twenty in honor of the Vegas cast this week while swirling round my stripper pole with my toes pointed up.
I think that Irulan and Arissa are overreacting this season. They are making big deals out of nothing. They need to relax and enjoy the free shit that MTV and the Palms is giving them.
Posted by: Mary at June 21, 2007 02:21 AM
Haha! That was some sound advice and definitely makes me feel worthwhile for watching such educational programming... as far as gleaking is concerned... I had a different slightly more bodily-fluid-oriented definition... hmm...
Posted by: Damien at June 24, 2007 11:17 AM
Most of these people have become so annoying this sux compared to the original season. Irulan is a liar she says she is a photographer but I live in NYC and frequent the nightclub Marquee where I always see her serving drinks...what a loser!
Posted by: gmhdlip ncvsl at October 25, 2007 06:06 PM
Irulan, as in Irulan Corrino from Dune?
Alton, as in Alton DeVir from Homeland?
If you're gonna use made-up names, at least make up your own...
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