You really didn't think I was going to tell you that quickly, did you? Tonight was the big finale. The judges seemed less harsh this year. Well, that is, Piers seemed less harsh. Last year he made L.D. Miller cry then he exchanged words with David from Quick Change. But apparently, they kissed and made up, as Quick Change performed tonight. Poor Dania fell, and then slipped again on whatever was on the stage later in the act. I really could have done without seeing them again. The first time, it was amazing. The second time, it was great. The third time, it was still pretty good. The fourth time, I was thinking "Don't I still have pizza left in the fridge?" To me, it is the kind of act you can only see a few times before it wears thin. And was I the only one that had to rewind because I thought Jerry said they won last year? After about three rewinds, I finally understood that Jerry was saying "when 'you were on' last year."

Anyhow, after I wondered why the camera zoomed past Bill Bellamy during the opening of the show to focus on two teenagers, I finally settled in to watch what felt like the longest two-hour finale ever. Piers wasn't his usual self tonight. He cracked three ribs doing God only knows what. We saw the top ten contestants perform one last time to "Celebration." Joining them on stage was the "America's Got Talent" dancers. Huh? Did I miss something? Have we had dancers on the show all season? And could they have picked a happy song that had been a hit within the last 30 years? That song was a hit when I was a teenager!

Each of the final four contestants performed one more time with a surprise guest. I suppose I am old (refer to the teenager statement above) because I didn't even recognize two of the "special" guests. The first was Sean Kingston who sang with Butterscotch. Next up was Terry Fator performing with his idol - someone I recognized. No, it was not Tony Bennett as I thought, but Kermit the Frog. They sang James Taylor's "You've Got a Friend" and Terry was, as usual, spot on with his impersonation. I pictured Piers leaning over to Sharon to say, "It will be a damn shame if he doesn't win" while the Hoff was busy thinking, "That's really Kermit." Terry got a special video message from Miss Piggy who encouraged everyone to vote for Terry, which made me think "Wait a minute; I thought all the voting was over?"

Next up was Julienne Irwin performing with Taylor Swift, another name I didn't recognize. At the end of the performance, I thought Taylor said America should vote for Julienne. Wait, are we still voting? I thought this was it?

Then Cas performed "Red Red Wine" with UB40. Who knew they were even together anymore? He also got a video message from Lionel Richie, which was nice. I'm sorry - I must confess - I am a Lionel Richie fan.

Then, they took a cue from "So You Think You Can Dance" and decided to eliminate one contestant at a time until they reached the final two. The first to go was Julienne Irwin. Heck, even she knew it was coming. After Terry and Butterscotch were told they were safe, Julienne mouthed "Cas" before his name was even called as being safe.

Then, to stretch out the show, we saw Stomp Out Loud perform. I will have to save the finale for my 3 year old to see. He loves these guys. I think it is because they can beat on things and make noise without their mommies yelling at them. We even have a Sesame Street DVD with them on it. Hey, wait a minute...

We saw Kashif and Boy Shakira in the audience. Then a heartbreaking moment - another contestant was eliminated. I figured Butterscotch would be next and she was. Which is sad - she was so unique and talented. Next up was a recap of some of the less than stellar acts that appeared this season: the dude that broke a ruler with his butt, bad Elvis, Thoth, Sexy Techno Boy, the male belly dancer, Leonid the Magnificent, the disco grandma, the pogo stick guy (wait a minute, he was cool!), and the Jamaican Stevie Wonder. Then, the "America's Got Talent" Audition All-Stars performed to "We are the Champions" (again, I was a teen when this song was a hit!). It was mostly the freak acts, but the pogo guy was there as was Mr. Big "Who's the Man?" Beal. Both were talented and frankly, I am still wondering what happened to Mr. Big as he was awesome in his audition. Did anyone else notice the one girl had on a shirt that said "I Want to Hassel the Hoff?" No, that was not a typo on my part either. Spell checking the television - I really should get a life!

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. The Hoff sang. My first thought was "My God, is he channeling Shatner?" I am serious, I could hardly watch without laughing. What are the people of Germany thinking?

It was down to Cas and Terry and I honestly thought someone was going to pass out before Jerry called a name. Why shows feel they must drag out the results like this, I will never know. In my opinion, it certainly doesn't make for good television. And this was a tough one - both Terry and Cas were very, very talented guys who were so humble and likeable. Somehow, after all the crap acts, "America's Got Talent" managed to redeem itself by having these two guys in the finale.

Finally, Jerry announced the name of the winner - it was Terry Fator! I was so happy! I mean, I was sad for Cas, but I was hoping Terry would win. I was so afraid that if Terry didn't win, the sock puppets in the audience would storm the stage and wreck havoc. He not only got the million-dollar prize, it was also announced that he would get to play the Jubilee Theater at Bally's in Las Vegas - his dream!

Congratulations to Terry and hopefully we will all be hearing more from Cas and Butterscotch!

Okay, call me crazy, but I don't remember the show going quite like this last year. Were there just two finalists? Anyhow, this year, they were narrowing eight down to four and we are voting for the person we wanted to win tonight. Oh, did I give away anything by using the word "person?"

Anyhow, tonight, each of the four remaining acts would do one performance based on the judge's choice and one based on their own choice. Again, am I giving anything away yet?

The first act to make it through was Cas Haley. Good job America - this guy is the real deal. Humble, likable and talented, Cas was given the task of singing "I Can't Help Falling in Love with You" by Elvis. The problem for me was this song was put to a reggae beat by UB40 in the 90s. I mean, seriously, why didn't the judges just give him a Bob Marley song to sing and cut through the chase? I am not criticizing Cas - I loved his version. But there really wasn't any challenge to it. Sharon said she thought he had found his comfort zone. No, the judges found it for him! But he did do a great job. For his second performance, he chose to sing Stevie Wonder's "Sir Duke." Ew, I wasn't sure about this one. "Sir Duke" is my favorite Stevie song and I started hearing it put to a reggae beat in my mind and it made me grimace, but Cas sang it true to form. I thought it would tick off Piers, but he said Stevie is a hero of his and Cas matched him pound for pound. David said he thought Cas had a great shot at winning.

Next up was Butterscotch. No big surprise here, at least not for me. Butterscotch, like Cas, is very talented. To me, both are truly gems this show was lucky to find. Compared to certain clown acts that made it far further than they should have, I was pretty much sure from day one that Cas and Butterscotch would be in the finals. The judges wanted her to sing Marvin Gaye's "What's Going On?" She sang it straight, no beat box, but put her own magnificent spin on it. I love her jazzy voice, but Piers said he missed the beat boxing. She brought it back to him two fold in the next performance. She did "Dance to the Music" and most of the song was beat boxing. It was incredible. Sharon said she was multi-talented and David said he was glad they didn't have to vote because it was tough.

I was so glad to hear Terry Fator's name called next! He's such a classy act and it's so cool that he wants to bring ventriloquism back to the mainstream. The judges wanted him to sing Garth Brook's "I've Got Friends in Low Places." He brought out Walter T. Airdale, complete with cowboy hat and shirt and Terry did a great impersonation of Garth. David told him he was originally the dark horse, but now he was leading the competition. Piers said that they chose a country song, but that he found country music boring. He said Terry's challenge was to make the song interesting and Piers thought that impersonation was utterly hilarious. For Terry's second song, he chose to do Roy Orbison's "Crying" with Winston the Impersonating Turtle. He guaranteed his last performance would be worth a million dollars and he wasn't kidding. After giving him a standing ovation, Piers said he thought Terry would be crying all the way to the bank because he thought he was going to win the million dollars.

One name left to be called. Poor little Julienne Irwin looked like she was going to pass out and the Glamazons looked almost as nervous. Robert just stood there with that big smile of his. Sometimes I imagine that he is such a happy guy, he must smile in his sleep. The Sideswipe guy kept giving the camera his best Jean-Claude Vam Damme look while Jason Pritchett just seemed ticked off.

The final name called was Julienne Irwin. The judges chose for her to sing a more contemporary song "What Hurts the Most." Piers said that he didn't like her because he said he didn't think she would be in the finals and she proved him wrong. Then, he told her that he didn't think her voice was mature enough for the competition and she proved him wrong again. Her second performance was a bit cliché. She chose to sing "Over the Rainbow." David said she started out a bit shaky, but kicked it into high gear. Sharon and Piers both said they didn't think she had done enough to win.

If I had to guess, I would say it was between Cas, Butterscotch, and Terry. I know all 20 of my votes went to Terry, but I am not sure who will prevail. Certainly, in my mind at least, they all three deserve the million. I just feel that Terry is such a unique act and I guess I have become a bit anesthetized to singers - even good singers. I am sure that no matter what happens, Cas and Butterscotch will be offered record deals and we will be seeing Terry headline in Vegas soon.

Oh, America's Got Talent producers...you did it again. Tonight, the competition would be narrowed down to the final 8 acts. But, did we find out who those acts were at the beginning of the show? No, we did not. Each act that was voted through to the next round was called out individually, and then they performed. This meant the remaining acts were just standing around, waiting. How nerve-wracking that must have been! Why don't we just shackle the remaining talent to the wall while the others perform? Probably wouldn't be any less torturous.

So the first name called out was Robert Hatcher. I was actually glad to hear his name called. He seems like such a nice guy who really deserves a break. Tonight, each contestant told us who his or her hero was and Robert's was Al Green. That is right, Reverend Al Green, from my own hometown, Memphis, Tennessee. Unfortunately, Robert chose to sing an Al Green song, "Let's Stay Together" and no one but Al Green should sing Al Green. It should be a national law or something. Robert didn't do bad - in fact, Piers said it was a very, very good performance. But it wasn't Al Green.

Next up was Julienne Irwin. I was worried that she might not make it through to the next round after last week. She said that last week's song might have been too big for her. So, what song did she choose this week? She chose to sing Patsy Cline's "Crazy." Oh honeychild, if you are looking for a song that isn't too big for you, you certainly don't look in the Patsy Cline repertoire. I thought The Hoff was grimacing half way through (I know I was), but he said he was looking away to see if he could not think of her as a fourteen year old girl. Sharon said the song was too old. But, it was Piers that delivered the deathblow with his "I don't think you will be here next week. Your voice isn't mature enough to win the competition." I know the audience booed, but I think that *gasp* I am agreeing with Piers on this one.

The next act to go through to the next round was my personal favorite, Terry Fator. His act is just so, so classy. This week, he dedicated his performance to his sister. He brought out Johnny Davis and sang both Dean Martin and Tony Bennett. He even had Piers saying not only did he sing better than most of his fellow competitors, he also sang "I Left My Heart in San Francisco" better than Tony Bennett did.

Cas Haley was the next one to hear his name called. He took heed of Pier's advice last week to stick to a reggae beat and put that spin on "Easy" by the Commodores. I love the Commodores and surprisingly, I loved Cas' version of it. Sharon said he chose the perfect song. Piers was not only impressed that he took his advice, but also said he could win the whole thing. I agree.

Jason Pritchett was called out next. He sang "If Tomorrow Never Comes" and I thought he did pretty well, as did David and Sharon, but Piers lit into him. He said, "The question was are you more than a cruise ship singer? You are not. You are going back to the cruise ship."

After calling the names of 5 solo acts, they finally called a group name. Unfortunately, for me, it was the Glamazons. If you have read my past blogs, you know I have no love lost for the Glamazons. Once I heard the opening notes of "It's Raining Men," I began to grimace. No, first, I rolled my eyes, and then I grimaced. They may be the Weather Girls weight wise, but voice wise, uh, no. Piers keeps pointing out how their voices aren't that great, but they have great entertainment value. I'm just not seeing it. Personally, they made me start to long for Boy Shakira tonight.

Butterscotch was the only solo act remaining among the group acts, but that didn't last for long as her name was called next. I still am not feeling a whole lot of love for the glammed up Butterscotch look. I like the beat girl look, but I know the judges picked on her to look like a star. She sang "My Funny Valentine" tonight for her heroes - her grandparents. As usual, she was flawless. I am thinking she and Cas Haley may have to have a loser leaves town match to see who the final champ will be (although all my votes are going to Terry Fator).

There were three acts remaining - The Duttons, Sideswipe, and the Calypso Tumblers, but only one place left. Who would it be? Then Jerry called out the name...Sideswipe. I was disappointed. As Nigel Lythgoe would say, America got it wrong. The Calypso Tumblers were much better in my opinion. And the tall dude even changed up his hair this week. It was a Sly Stone afro circa 1970. Now I will never know what 'do he would have sported next week. But, Sideswipe was much improved this week, even if their pirate act did make me feel as if I was in front of Treasure Island on the Vegas Strip. The wench ended up on The Hoff's lap, so he was happy.

Now for my final gripe of the week. The first five acts were solos. Then we got the Glamazons, then another solo act. So out of the top 8, we have six solos and two group acts. Of the six solos, five are singers. Overall, the final 8 consists of six singing acts, a ventriloquist, and a um, whatever you call Sideswipe. Is it just me or does this seem sad? If I wanted to see strictly singers, I would watch American Idol. Is that really all the talent America has - singing? Or is this just a fluke? I don't know, but I know I am disappointed, especially since the two group acts are two of my least favorites.

This week's episode started out with a bang. We found out which five of the remaining acts would be in the final ten. I was happy to hear Terry Fator's name called first. I really think he is talented and definitely deserves his place in the final ten. Next up was the Duttons. I personally don't care for them, but I figure there are a lot of people who visited Branson and saw their act that are probably at home voting for them. I was a bit surprised to hear the Calypso Tumblers made it into the final ten. Not because they are not good - they are. But, they are a street act and not as polished as some of the other acts.

The next name called was Cas Haley. I was so glad to know he made it! There was one name left to be called and everyone looked so nervous. The last act to be called into the final ten was Jason Pritchett. I was a bit disappointed that The Fault Line or the 2nd Story Guys didn't make it, but overall, I was pretty happy with the results. Boy Shakira didn't make the finals, but he took it like a man, so to speak. Sharon said there were a few she would not have put through to the finals. I wonder who it was. Calypso Tumblers? The Duttons? I guess we will never know.

We then saw all ten acts perform, as America has to vote for eight to move on this week. That means two will be eliminated from the competition. The Duttons performed first. They sang "The Devil Went Down to Georgia." I enjoyed it better than "La Bamba" but the tempo was not as quick as the Charlie Daniels' version. Piers X'd them, saying their violins had the same sound of shrimp when they are boiled alive. Do they boil shrimp alive? I thought that was lobsters. But I digress. David said they nailed it and Sharon said they reminded her of the Waltons, but in a good way.

Robert Hatcher was up next. I like him - I think he has a really good voice. But for some reason, he just never grabs me. Sharon loved his performance. Piers said it was not his best performance, but his emotion and passion made up for any singing difficulties.

I really wasn't sure the Calypso Tumblers deserved to be in the finals, but they certainly proved me wrong. They were one of the best acts tonight, certainly putting the other action act, Sideswipe, to shame. The one guy is still channeling Prince, but as Sharon said, they set an incredible pace tonight. Even Piers said with a performance like that, they had a chance to win.

Jason Pritchett returned to his country roots this week, singing "When You Say Nothing At All." I thought it was much better than last week and so did the judges, although Piers said he thought Jason had "it,' but he hasn't seen it yet.

Butterscotch sang, "It's Your Thing." I liked the more demure Butterscotch better, but Piers still complained that she sulked around the stage and didn't act like a star. David told her she was leading the pack and Sharon felt she took it up to a completely different level.

The Glamazons sang "Fever." I am sure Peggy Lee was rolling over in her grave. Wait, she is dead, isn't she? Anyhow, David said they brought it tonight, but both Sharon and Piers agreed they didn't have the best voices of the show. I'm still not on the "we love you because you are big girls and not afraid to put it out there" band wagon. That stuff works on Oprah, but on a talent show, I want to see talent.

And see talent I did with the next act, Cas Haley. This was the week where I should have loved his song and I did. I don't know the name of the song, but it was bluesy and I love it when he does bluesy stuff. I could close my eyes and almost feel like I was on Beale Street. But Piers said he preferred when Cas sang reggae. Whatever dude.

Terry Fator was up next. I just love this guy - I like several acts in the final ten, but I have this secret wish that Terry will win the whole thing. I really do. He's classy, he's funny, he's talented - he's what this show is all about. Sorry, the Hoff took over my fingers there for a minute. Piers told Terry he was the best ventriloquist he had ever seen.

I don't know if nerves have gotten to poor young Julienne Irwin or if she just chose a song that was too big for her, but the judges were not impressed. They were nice, but talked about problems with pitch and her pushing too much to get the song out.

Sideswipe closed out the night with a performance that was manic. There were only three of them on stage and I was thinking, "Where's the fourth guy?" Then he came busting out of the set with four of their young students. David said it was confusing and Sharon said they needed to move on in the act. On to where? They are a karate act. What else can they do? They are like Quick Change from last year - this is as good as it gets. Or as bad as it gets in Pier's opinion. You know he hates kids in the act and frankly, I have to agree a bit. The kids were cute and good, but I abhor seeing kids in an act like this. But, I think they will move on because Piers did attack the kids and the one guy who was speaking was moved to tears - well, as close to tears as a tough karate guy would allow himself to get on national television. And you know America always votes for the acts that Piers makes cry!

It is tough to say who will be going home. If it were up to me, I would say the Glamazons and Sideswipe, but then you probably already guessed that. I think Cas and Butterscotch are safe, but who knows who the viewers will vote for. I know the Calypso Tumblers just blew everyone away, so I dare say they are safe as well. I only hope that Terry lives to ventriloquit another day. Yes, I just made up that word.

2nd Story Guys
These guys are, as Hasselhoff would say "what this show is all about!" I like these guys, they are a freak act, but they are classy and talented. That is what I want from this show. I don't want to see freak shows like Boy Shakira and I don't want to see homespun family acts like the Duttons. I want to see someone with a truly original talent who nails it ever week, which is exactly what these guys do.

Southern Girls
I have to admit, I didn't care for these girls the first time I saw them. But tonight, they impressed me. They weren't up there imitating Beyonce, but singing a song that was reminiscent of a Fifties girl's group. I liked it, however the judges did not. Piers said they were not in tune and flat. He also said their chemistry was off. Sharon wanted to know who the lead singer was. I think they handled it with class when the one girl said there was not one lead singer, that they were a group. Kudos to them!

Popovich Comedy Pet Theater
This started off slow, but the cat pushing the dog in the stroller was cute. The mink coat (ferret coat?) trick was too funny. But Piers X'd them, saying it was awful. Sharon thought the performance had to be more about the animals. David said it was nebulous.

Cas Haley
It seems that I really enjoy every other performance by Cas Haley. I didn't care for Message in a Bottle, but I think that was a Police thing. I did love the bluesy song he did last time. This week, he performed Higher and Higher with a Jamaican beat. It was just okay for me. Sharon said "we are gonna see you at the final." Thankfully, the judges didn't harass him about his clothing this time!

Terry Fator
I love Terry's act. He has been one of my favorites since the first time I saw him. Tonight, he has Winston the Impersonating Turtle singing What a Wonderful World - as Kermit the Frog. But, as if that weren't incredible (and funny!) enough, then Terry joined in, impersonating Louis Armstrong. I totally have to agree with Piers. He told Terry that he thought he could win because not only is he a great ventriloquist, but he's a great singer, impressionist, and comedian. I loved it when the Hoff said, "I never thought a man with a turtle doing a frog could make me emotional."

The Fault Line
These guys are great, but tonight, they sang a Michael Jackson song - "The Way You Make Me Feel." Now, I like that song, but it just wasn't right for them and their image. As Piers said, he wants them to come out with a big rock song. The lead singer said out of their set, this is one of the softer songs. I hope they make it to the final ten so we can see them again.

Boy Shakira
Jerry tried to warn us that we were in for a surprise. Boy Shakira was no more - now he was...Boy Britney? If you could see me typing this, you would know that I just rolled my eyes. Honestly, the crowd went wild - why do these people love this guy? Don't get me wrong, I love a good drag queen. Or even a bad one for that matter! Hell, I had a drag queen at my bachelorette party. But, I am just not feeling the love for him. Piers said he is quickly becoming his guilty pleasure, Sharon said he was "absolutely amazing," and David said he thought the entire audience was on medication. Good grief, now I am agreeing with the Hoff! If he makes it through to the final ten, are we gonna see Boy Paris or Boy Lindsay?

Jason Pritchett
I thought Jason was a good singer, but this week, he sang Life is a Highway, which to me is a rock song. Piers even told him that he was a good-looking guy, talented, and popular, but he preferred him sitting with his guitar, singing country songs as opposed to him pretending to be Bon Jovi. Sharon disagreed, but I think Piers nailed it. He was much better with country. There are rocking country songs - stick to those Jason!

Calypso Tumblers
Okay, I have been watching this show since day one - have we even seen these guys before? I mean, I remember seeing small glimpses of them, but have we seen anything other than that? I like them. People talk about Boy Shakira and his heart, but to me, these guys are much more dedicated and earnest. They obviously love what they do. Piers thought they could have done more tumbling. David mentioned seeing them on Venice Beach and that they had the same energy. I like them, I just don't know that they have what it takes to make the final. Now, that being said, was I the only one that noticed the one guy had a Prince haircut circa 1984? Is that look coming back?

The Duttons
I am sorry, maybe it was because I used to live near Branson or maybe it was because my grandparents forced me to watch Hee Haw for years, but the Duttons just get under my skin. The whole family "aren't we just as annoying as the Osmonds were thirty years ago?" thing gets to me. And this week - this week, they sang La Bamba? And the one guy did the moonwalk? Are you kidding me? That kind of stuff flies in a Branson show (trust me, unfortunately I know), but I just don't think it is going to get it for a show like this. But then again, Boy Shakira made it to the final twenty - anything is possible. And like Jerry said, there are so many of them, they can just vote for themselves and win.

Then, after the wait, we found out who made it into the final ten from the first ten acts. Much as with last week's Last Comic Standing, I have mixed emotions about the results. The first two names called - Julieanne Irwin and Butterscotch made me SO happy. I love those two performers. But then, my worst fear - the Glamazons made it. I think I would rather have seen Kashif make it. Robert Hatcher's name was called next. I was happy with that - he was a good singer. While Johnny Lonestar looked like he was going to pass out, the last name was called - Sideswipe. Huh? Oh. Personally, I would have chosen Manuel Romero over Sideswipe every day of the week and twice on Sunday, but that is just me. Even Johnny Lonestar was more exciting and talented than these guys, he just didn't take his shirt off. So for me, it was two "YES!'s" one "Oh good," and two "Oh no!'s"

Who are the other five going to be rounding out the final ten? I would have to say 2nd Story Guys, Cas Haley, Terry Fator, The Fault Line, and - only because VoteForTheWorst is encouraging people to vote for him - Boy Shakey or Boy Britra, whatever his name is now.

What was that? Who did I vote for? All ten of my phone votes and all ten of my online votes went to Terry Fator.

This is the first round of the semifinals. From now on, the voting is in the hand's of the viewers, not the judges. That is good and bad. Like "American Idol" opens itself up to ridicule (read Sanjaya), so does "America's Got Talent." But unlike "American Idol," "America's Got Talent" brings it all on itself. The popular web site Vote for the Worst is already asking people to vote for Boy Shakira. His winning could ruin what little reputation and respectability this show still has. But, no one can vote for Boy Shakira until next week, so let's talk about this week's ten.

Overall, it was pretty good. The show started with Johnny Lonestar. The gold lame pants were a bit much (although Sharon wanted to pinch his "gold bum"), but he still put on a great show. It is a cool act and he has the whole Roy Rogers gosh honesty red-blooded American boy smile down pat. The Hoff gazed up at Johnny like a five-year-old at his first rodeo, but then he told Johnny to bring back something other than the rope act. Duh David, the ropes ARE his act.

Next up was Julienne Irwin. There is only one thing I don't like about Julienne and that is that she is a teenage girl. Don't get me wrong - she is adorable and a great singer. If you turn away from the television, it is easy to forget you are listening to a fourteen-year-old girl. Only problem is Bianca Ryan, last year's winner. If Julienne wins (and so far, it would be deservedly so), that just turns the show into a child singing competition. Maybe I am wrong (and I hope so), but I just don't think Julienne will win.

Kevin James - can someone please explain to me exactly what happened here? Oh, I don't mean with the act, I mean with the lack of an act. Kevin came out on stage in a plastic suit with what I was afraid was Marilyn Manson's "Beautiful People" playing in the background (it wasn't). He then proceeded to pull a foot, heart, and hand out of a cooler. The fingers on the hand wiggled. For about 10 seconds, I thought "Cool," then even my gullible mind went "Hey, that is his hand!" He then put the hand back in the cooler, pulled out a beer, and drank it. I hate to agree with the Hoff, but I felt the same way when he said, "That was it?" What happened? Kevin James was edgy, scary, fun, and unique...until this week. It is almost as if he woke up this morning and said to himself "You know what, this really isn't the show for me" and intentionally tried to blow it. It was very disappointing!

Next up was Robert Hatcher. Robert is a good singer, but why did Piers have to use his performance as a plug for "America's Got Talent?" "There's no other show in the world where a guy like you could come from a Cincinnati sewage plant..." Forgive me but sometimes I tire of the judges telling us just what a great show this is.

One of my favorite acts was up next, Jonny Come Lately (and I apologize for misspelling your act's name in my previous blogs!). I thought they were great, but Piers accused them of mimicking another act, a comment to which oddly enough the audience applauded. The Hoff said he felt like they were still holding back. Um, HELLO, they are 15 years old appearing on national television. Cut them some slack Dave.

I must apologize because I missed a few of the acts tonight, the first being Kashif. We had tornado warnings in our area (but not really close to me), so I missed Kashif's dance because the weatherman interrupted. But, that was just fine with me. You know, I am tired of ragging on this poor guy. He came on this show, perhaps as a joke and the judges have put him up for ridicule before the whole nation.

I did manage to catch most of Butterscotch's performance. I personally liked the camouflage look, but Piers didn't. I thought it made her look a bit more the part. The Hoff did come out and say he thought she had what it took to win the whole thing.

I totally missed Sideswipe's performance too, due to the weatherman again. But much like Kashif, it was okay. I have never really been taken with their act, no matter how many times they tear their shirts off.

Manuel Romero was good tonight. I love the song he sang ("Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman"), loved the movie it came from, loved it's star, Johnny Depp, so how can I not love Manuel? I did think that David was smoking crack when he said something about how Manuel has developed since they first saw him. I am sorry - did I miss something? His act was pretty polished from the start.

Last up was the Glamazons and I think you know how I feel about them already. If you don't, read my last blog. You know, I think it is wonderful they are going on this soul-searching quest to feel good about themselves, but does that somehow warrant winning a million dollars in a talent show? I am glad to see that all three judges mentioned their talent this time rather than just how great it was that they are so confident in their own skin, blah, blah, blah. Heck, I am a big girl and confident - show me the money!

So America, it is in your hands how. You can vote by calling in or through the NBC web page. Who did I vote for? I'll never tell! Okay, you forced it out of me - I gave my ten phone call votes to Butterscotch and my ten online votes to Jonny Come Lately. Next week, we see the next ten then it is narrowed down to the final ten.

First up was Sideswipe, the karate troupe. Piers said they had amazing energy, but they needed to look more like an entertainment act. Sharon said they needed to add more dance, but in the end, they found out they were going to the final 20. Terry Fader, one of my favorites this season, was also told he was going through. If you've forgotten who he was, he was the great ventriloquist whose dummies sang.

Johnny Lonestar is the cowboy who's name I could not remember in my last blog. How can you forget a name like that? Anyhow, Sharon said she thought he was unique and he too is going through to the finals.

Next up were the two magician acts - Anthony Reed and Kevin James. Piers actually told Anthony that his water act was a "damp squid" because he couldn't really see what was happening. Duh! That is the premise behind that particular performance Piers. If you saw what he was doing, then it wouldn't be very magical, now would it? In the end, they sent Anthony home and put Kevin through to the final 20.

The Redneck Tenors were told they were not going through to the next round and I thought the Bubba in the middle was going to punch Piers. When they were told "no," their mouths dropped and the guy in the middle asked "are you serious?" He then said it was "just wrong." This guy was seriously ticked about being sent home.

The next two acts, the Second Story Guys and the Fault Line were both put through to the finals. I was surprised that the dog act, the Popovich Pet Theatre was put though. I thought Piers despised animal acts, but apparently not. The girl group Southern Girls were also told they made the finals, but Cocoa Brown, the lone comic left in the competition, was sent home.

Of course, the family act The Duttons made it though. Michael Strelo-Smith, who fought off the flu to perform in Las Vegas, was told he would not be moving on. Piers said there was a lot of argument about it, but Boy Shakira was told he made the top 20. Warm fuzzy music played as he called his mom to tell her the good news.

Little 7 year old singer Sage was sent home as were The Rascals. They sent home my man Leonid the Magnificent - I think merely because he was more magnificent than the Hoff, Sharon, and Piers put together. Oh, I was going to wait to hold my opinions for later in the blog - sorry!

The Glamazons made it though as did singers Cas Haley and Manuel Romero, but the boy group Ahmir was sent home. The Calypso Tumblers are going to the final 20 as is a new favorite of mine, Butterscotch. Country singer Jason Pritchett had to return to his job on the cruise ship before the final decisions were made, but Sharon phoned him with the good news that he would be moving on to the finals. Singer Robert Hatcher was the final male singer and young Julienne Irwin was the final female singer to make it to make it through. The judges chose Julieanne over Fallon. Another of my favorite acts Johnny Come Lately made it and so did dancer Kashif.

Now, for the moment you've no doubt been waiting on...my thoughts on tonight's show. I was happy that Terry Fader and Johnny Come Lately made the final cut. I would have turned off the television if Cas Haley or Butterscotch were sent home. Seriously, I was ready to press the button on the remote. I was appalled that they saw fit to put Kashif and Boy Shakira through, yet not totally surprised. Anthony Reed has more talent in his little finger than Boy Shakira. If you want to keep a drag queen on the show for entertainment, keep the drag queen of all drag queens - Leonid. Boy Shakira looks like a fourteen year old who just put on his first dress. No comedians in the top 20? What? Were they all busy doing "Last Comic Standing?" Cocoa Brown wasn't better than Kashif? And what was that whole "bringing your culture to our show" thing Sharon was talking about? Was Kashif supposed to be doing an Indian dance? I don't think so. The Redneck Tenors got ripped off and I was glad to see them react with a bit of anger. I was hoping to not see any more of the Glamazons as I personally don't find fat chicks in lingerie entertaining. And what happened to Andrew Mr. Big "Who's the Man?" Beal? The sax player that stole the show in Dallas was shown briefly last night - at least I think it was him. But then, nothing. No mention of either him or Luka "Lazy Legs" and the Illmatic Styles. Either tell us about people and tell us their fate (good or bad) or just leave them off the show. The inconsistency kills me!

I am disappointed again this year that more talented acts were overlooked for the oddball acts. Either this is a respectable talent show or it is the Gong Show. It can't be both, which is what it seems like the producers are hoping to accomplish. I am afraid this irregularity along with problems like not showing us who really made it through will be the downfall of the show.

First up was the Glamazons, one of my least favorite acts. Sharon thought their harmonies were off. The group of 15-year-old Stray Cat wannabes, Johnny Come Lately, was up next. This is one of my favorite acts, but I was saddened when the judges said they weren't as good as before. I love these kids, right down to the lead singer's "Thank you very much" Elvis signoff. Third up was Fallon, the Jewel-like singer. She had guitar trouble, but I actually liked her better this time than during the auditions. However, Sharon claimed she was good, but had no extra "oomph." Cinda Ramseur was really hoping this was her big shot and seemed to give it her all as she sang. Piers and Sharon both said they liked her.

After those four performers, we saw a brief clip of acts - country singer Jason Pritchett, teen singer Julienne Irwin, the Rascals, the Duttons, and The Fault Line. The next act up was Cas, the singer who Sharon told to get a new outfit. He got new jeans, new tennis shoes, and a new shirt. Not exactly what I think Sharon was talking about, but hey, he tried, you know? I was more impressed with this performance of what seemed like a blues song than I was with his original audition of "Message in a Bottle." The only comments we heard from Sharon and Piers were that they didn't like his clothes. Hey, give the guy a break! He seems like a blue-collar kind of guy - he tried to clean up the best he could. Seriously, Sharon is married to Ozzy - talk about cleaning up! Okay, back to the show...

I absolutely loved Butterscotch this week, the female beat boxer, but I think it was because I really, really liked her singing. And who knew she could play the piano? The Hoff mentioned that she seems shy, but I thought she was fabulous tonight. I also thought Byrain did well and the judges seemed to love him. Michael Strelo-Smith had a big problem - he had the flu and thought it might affect his voice. But Piers said he was actually more impressed with him each time he heard him.

Now, here is a beef I have with "America's Got Talent" - they never tell us exactly who has made it through. Out of 21 acts going to the next round, I was able to identify 11 of them. Why not just show a close-up of all those that made it through? As best I could tell, we will be seeing more of Julienne Irwin, the Rascals, the Duttons, The Fault Line, Johnny Come Lately (YES!), the Glamazons (ugh), Butterscotch, Cas, Michael Strelo-Smith, Fallon, and the 3 Redneck Tenors. Among those going home were Cinda and Byrain. Cinda is can sort of understand, but I thought Byrain nailed it and thought the judges loved him. And besides, he was better than the Glamazons!

Okay, next up was the variety acts. First up was Granny Pearl, who less than wowed the judges. Piers and Sharon mentioned it was the same material. From there, it just got worse. They showed the knife throwing reverend miss - no, not hit the girl, but the knife didn't stick in the board. They showed magician Eli Kerr having trouble with a screen during his act. Then after those gaffs, they showed baton twirler John Mitchell. Excuse me, did we ever seen this guy in the auditions? The answer to that question would be "NO." So why show him now? Because he gave, as Piers put it "the performance of his life." Sounds good, doesn't it? Too bad, he was cut by the end of the show. But more about that later. We saw magicians Anthony Reed and his mentor Kevin James. Now Anthony's act was good - edgy, sexy, and dangerous. I figured no way Kevin was going to top that, but man, was I wrong! He was simply amazing! He cut what seemed to be a mannequin in two and laid the top half on a table. Then he made a foot move. He turned the top part of the body, and then the "mannequin" did a handstand - on a table! Kevin then took both pieces, laid them on a gurney, stapled them together, and dang if they guy didn't get up and do a little jig right there. Seriously, that was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen and I have seen a few magic acts in my time. This guy just seems like a consummate professional. As far as I am concerned, just give him the million now.

Poor little acrobat Christian had a bit of bad luck - his Chihuahua was bitten by another dog and couldn't perform. But the Hoff said he made it work without him. Megan Miller, the cute little ventriloquist who Piers said wasn't an adult act, had her dummy sing Broadway tunes. It was much better, but honestly, I think I will puke if I hear one more person (or dummy for that matter) sing "You're Gonna Love Me." Give that song a rest - please, I beg of you!

We saw brief clips of the dance troupe that had the Phantom of the Opera masks (can't remember their name and God forbid the show should remind us), Luka "Lazy Legs" and the Illmatic Styles, the Second Story Guys, and the rodeo guy. Kashif danced again. Can someone please tell me why he is still here? He would be funny if I were drinking in a bar and saw him doing his dance. He is a nice enough guy, but please, the dancing has lost its hilarity for me.

Then tragedy struck. Ivan, the Urban Action Figure was going to jump on a mini-tramp and fly over chairs. Well, it looked like his foot slipped on the trampoline and he flew - right into the chairs. Then, when he didn't move, I was sure he was dead! No one knew if that was part of the act or not. Poor guy! I can laugh now, knowing he is okay, but when he rolled, landed straight up on his head, then fell straight backwards, it looked like a cartoon! Thank God Jerry was there to tell us "This was not supposed to happen apparently." That Jerry, always on top of things.

What variety acts were put through? I saw Luka "Lazy Legs" and the Illmatic Styles, Leonid the Magnificent (who sadly got little air time tonight), Anthony Reed, Kevin James, Kashif (you have to be kidding me!), the rodeo guy (what IS his name?), Sideswipe, Boy Shakira (another travesty), and a dog act. Going home was Granny Peal, poor little Christian and his dog, John Mitchell and his batons (which surprised me greatly after all of Piers' praise), Eli Kerr, and poor Megan, who looked so happy on stage, then broke into tears. How they could put Kashif and Boy Shakira through over John Mitchell and Megan, I have no idea. Next time Sharon, David, or Piers open their mouths about their show and its "standards," someone should come out and slap them. Putting those two acts through, even to the semi semifinals, is just a joke.

Tomorrow night, we find out the top 20...or at least those we can make out from watching the show.

More auditions to highlight the best and weirdest talent America has to offer. I was excited during the preview when I heard that my man Leonid would be back! I love Leonid (yes, I know he is gay). He is such a diva, yet I find him oddly entertaining and earnest in his quest for fame.

Okay, first up tonight was Rubberboy. Now, now, get your mind out of the gutter - Rubberboy is a contortionist. He was good - not doubt about that, but I grimaced during the whole act. When he kissed his own butt, it was seriously time for him to go. But don't worry, Sharon and David voted him through to the next round.

America's at it again...this week competing in Chicago to see who is and who isn't talented. I saw a couple of acts that, as Hasselhoff would say, "blew me away" tonight.

First up was the weird Gregorian chant/gospel singer Consuelo. She didn't have to tell me she was an academic after she went on and on about combining the different styles of singing. Piers immediately X'd her after the first note came out of her mouth and David was not far behind. We will not see Consuelo in the next round. Nor will we be seeing Charlie King, the bango playing tube and whistling guy that looked like a clown hobo. That was just...odd.

Sideswipe, the marital art/dance guys, was back this year. If you remember, they were put through to the next round last year, but had to back out due to injury. The audience loved them and Sharon wondered aloud if they moved like that at 9 o'clock in the morning just how they moved after midnight. Even Piers said he felt they could go all the way. I just kinda felt like "eh." They are good at what they do, but blow me away they did not.

Jason Pritchett, the country singer from Missouri, was good. Piers wasn't overly impressed and I was waiting for him to say it was "a bit karaoke" ala Simon Cowell, but Sharon and David loved him, so he moved on.

One of the acts that I absolutely LOVED tonight was Terry Fator. I am often annoyed by ventriloquists (I even hated Kukla, Fran and Ollie growing up), but this guy was simply amazing! His dummy, Emma Taylor, does impersonations of singers. And boy, did Terry pick a big one to imitate - Etta James! But he pulled it off fabulously. Both David and Sharon jumped up out of their seats and Piers was impressed. I really hope he can keep it up in the next round.

Poor little Francisse was not a good singer and when she got X'd she cried, but the judges, even Piers, did a good job of encouraging her. Butterscotch, the singer/beat boxer, was good, although personally, I enjoyed Blake Lewis from "American Idol" fame better. David really seemed to be on her bandwagon and thinks she can win.

I really don't know what the deal with John England was. The British Liberace was good - boring, but good at playing the piano. But Piers was so annoyed, he not only X'd him, he reached over and hit Sharon's buzzer! I kinda felt like David, I was waiting for something to wow me and it never did. But the sequined outfit was marvelous! Then we saw something tonight not many people get to see - a mime that sings! Piers pointed out to Danny Flores that never in the history of miming had that been done. And while Danny referred to himself as a mime and comedian, he really wasn't much of either.

The weirdest act of the night that made it through was Boy Shakira. This dude apparently loves Shakira and imitated her - well, at least he tried. Piers X'd him immediately, but suddenly the crowd seemed to love him and even Piers admitted after it was over that he began to rather like it. Hasselhoff, however, was incensed that Sharon and Piers voted him through. He was also angry that Piers put the kibosh on Coolaid (a dance act with inner city kids). Which leads me again to the made-up drama stuff that I hate about this show. David and Piers exchanged words, blah, blah, blah. Don't they have like a juggling drag queen act to show up instead of this garbage? It is SO fake.

I thought Cas Haley murdered the Police's song "Walking on the Moon," but oddly enough, Piers said he has heard Sting sing it a cappella and Cas sang it better than Sting. Whatever dude. We'll see how he does next round.

The Second Story Guys were incredible! These stilt dancers did stuff I had never seen. The backflip at the end was unbelievable! I am glad they are moving on, despite Piers' lame joke that they could go "a long way" in the competition. Har-dee-har-har Piers.

There were some interesting acts that made it though that we didn't get to see much of: the tumblers, the teenager who balanced the small dog on his feel upside down, and the barbershop - well, there were like 50 of them on stage, so they weren't a quartet, so I guess they were just a barbershop group.

Which brings me to another thing that I had about this show: Sharon told Hot Pink Feathers, the burlesque act, that they were not quite professional enough, not "up to the standards" of the show. Standards? What standards? They voted a fat guy in drag who couldn't dance on to the next round, yet they are going to preach to someone else about their "standards?" They did the same thing last year. They would vote some stupid act through (like the world's oldest male stripper), but then act high and mighty towards another one, mentioning their "standards." As far as I can tell, there really aren't any standards on this show, other than the whims of the judges as to who gets put through and who doesn't.

Okay, off my soapbox and back to the show. The second act that blew me away was The Fault Line. Those guys did an a cappella grunge thing that was amazing. Piers criticized them in that they were "three cool guys and two nerds" but I loved the act. I definitely want to see more of them.

Kevin James was a magician that started out slow, but was good. The Charlie Chaplin thing worked, I am just waiting to see what else he has up his sleeve, so to speak.

Piers didn't want to let 80 year old singer/comedian Ada Lynn through, but she was funny and quick too - especially for someone her age. I am glad David and Sharon saw fit to put her through.

Alex Mooney scared me breaking things with his butt - have we seen an act like that before? Wasn't there an oriental woman breaking chopsticks with her butt or am I thinking about some weird video I saw on Youtube? The Hoff had the last word on this one, telling Alex to "butt out."

That brings us to the last act, dancer Kashif. He stole the opening hand movements from the 70s PBS kid's show Zoom - I can do that too! It was weird - Piers said he was the most extraordinary dance he had seen in his life. I was a bit enthralled, but mostly, Kashif danced like a computer programmer who had had too much to drink at an office party. But the audience loved him so off he goes to the next round.

And that was it for Chicago. Some good acts, some weird acts, and a few awful acts. Next week, the auditions are in New York. Does New York have talent?

In case you missed it, last week was the return of one of NBC's highest rated shows - America's Got Talent. Sharon Osbourne replaced Brandy as a judge, but it seems like they aren't quite letting Sharon be Sharon. The whole thing last week about her walking off because Piers was being mean to the children seemed a bit staged. Sharon has enough personality on her own - just let her go to be herself!

This week, they replayed the Dallas auditions from last week. My favorite was Mr. Big "Who's the Guy?" Beal. He totally stole the show, but there were a few other acts that were really good. I loved the Human Slinky, even though, as Piers would say, "It's not a million dollar act." But, you have to give the guy credit for being creative!